It’s Happening! My Starbucks is Closing!

Actually, 3 of my Starbucks are closing. I never thought this would happen to me - ME!! Sure, 600 Starbucks stores are closing, but I felt a certain satisfaction knowing their world domination would be checked.

Don’t get me wrong, of many of the strong corporate cultures out there, I have felt Starbucks led in the ethics department. Subsidizing college tuition, health benefits, not supporting the war in Iraq (please do not confuse this with not supporting the troops; this idea was suffered by many of the peeps I met while suffering the unfortunate fate of living in Oklahama for a year and half).

While visiting London in 2000, however, I first understood the expansion intentions of Slutbucks (I LOVE this new nickname some religious yahoo gave the coffee shop because of their naked mermaid symbol. Apparently, the Christian genius thought her tail was actually her legs splayed. He’s now a poster-boy for the need for college education, if you get my drift). I had not seen a Starbucks in an international setting during my junior year abroad (Strasbourg, represent!) and I spotted the coffee behemoth on a street corner directly across from a lovely mom and pop café that had begun closing procedures. Sniff.

My body doesn’t like a lot of coffee. I haven’t figured out if it’s the acid levels or what, but I’ve always been able to drink Starbucks (especially their Breakfast Blend freshly ground) without too much trouble. So, I’ve developed quite an entrenched loyalty to Starbucks.

When I read that 600 Starbucks were closing, truthfully, I thought nothing of it. Really, we hardly ever actually go to Starbucks. It’s the psychological comfort of knowing my warm, caffeine injection was right around the corner awaiting a dog-on-the-leash, husband-at-my-side stroll.

No longer.

The only thing that could repair the damage to my American-consumer-convenience state of mind is if a walk-up tamale/taco/queso place opens in the stead of Starbucks. There’s already a dive-bar, liquor store, old-school burger joint, donut/jalapeno-pig-in-a-blanket shop, and Walgreens within walking distance of my home. If I can’t have my coffee, give me my tamales. Baby jesus, can you hear me? I swear I won’t play BINGO for a whole month if you let me have my tamales. And when I have children, I won’t give them sleeping pills and just spend the whole day at the BINGO parlor. Probably. Maybe.

Have a great weekend, everybody! And if you can get Sessions beer in your neck of the woods, buy it. Cause it’s some gorgeous stuff served from a stubby, brewed by Full Sail out of Hood River, Oregon.

You can click on this link on The Huffpo if you want to see if a Starbucks near you is closing.

Live Notes Taken During Al Gore’s Speech Today

• all the thanking he’s doing right now probably made a decent minority of viewers turn the channel to a TV judge show. we get it, already.
• he says politicians need get with the program or step aside. Ahem, Republicans.
• so many things going awry simultaneously (mortgage, bank, gas prices, we’re at war…).
• in five years, the entire northern polar ice cap could disappear one summer.
• has he lost weight? he looks better than he has in a long time.
• stats, stats and more stats.
• comment on situation iraq.
• crazy weather: floods, fires, etc.
• Stats.
• he’s much better with a teleprompter than even Obama. we won’t even get into McCain.
• politicians presenting old solutions to each crisis separately without taking the other crises into account.
• these solutions are not only ineffective, they make the other crises worse.
• borrowing money from china to buy oil from middle east. that has to change.
• the answer is to end our reliance on carbon-based fuel.
• talking about his solution summits. solutions to the climate crisis are the same solutions to the economy and guaranteeing our national security.
• Stats.
• production of electricity cheapest and easiest way to take advantage of renewal energy.
• New strategic initiative is linchpin of bold, new strategy to empower America.
• 100% of energy electricity and renewable and carbon-free sources within 10 years.
• Has he been talking with Boone Pickens? I hope so.
• Wind, solar, etc. getting cheaper and cheaper.
• Stats.

Dammit, CNN cut him off and now I’m watching McCain at a Kansas City Town Hall meeting talking about dependency on foreign oil and alternative energy resources and nuclear power. “Senator Obama opposes nuclear energy. He has a presidential seal I saw that says, ‘Yes, We Can.’ I think we should change it - ‘No, We Can’t’ or ‘No, We Won’t.’” Wow, CNN - this is sooooo much more important than a new energy initiative proposed by a former presidential candidate. Morons.

Found the transcript on The Huffpo.

U.S. Establishing Diplomatic Presence in Iran?

Here’s my theory:

A younger, well-read student of history disguises himself as an older, white male Republican. Imagine a light navy suit, white shirt with the collar that buttons down at the corners, bright-red tie, over-sized American flag lapel pin, light brown hair - slightly graying - that’s been calling for a clip for a week. Somehow, this Navy Suit gains audience with the president - the specifics aren’t important - and extracts a thin, hollow tube from his pants - no, not that tube! - a bamboo tube.

Without notice, a dart tipped with the Secret Serum of Logic (found at one of the oldest, unnoticed library’s in the U.S.) is loaded into the thin tube. The Navy Suit raises the tube to his lips and, much like we’ve seen on TV or even practiced ourselves with paper-wrapped straws, emits a sharp, intense breath into the elongated apparatus, forcing the dart from its launching position into the neck of the President of the United States of America, who unfortunately carries the name George W. Bush and dreams of spooning Dick Cheney in the nighttime.

Not-so-coincidentally, soon after the so-called “Dart Incident,” Army Lt. Gen. James Dubik says U.S. ground troops will be “mostly finished” in Iraq by mid-2009.

Most stunning of all, a week later The Guardian claims the U.S. will establish a diplomatic presence - “a halfway house to setting up a full embassy” - in the capital of Iran, Tehran. After 30 years of relatively cool relations between the U.S. and Iran, George W. Bush has chosen a bold strategy of reaching out to Tehran in an effort to slow the Middle East country’s development of nuclear technology.

Such out-of-character developments originating from the White House cause hopeful brows to furrow in consternation over the sharp 180 (can a 180 be sharp? anyway…) in U.S. foreign policy. Theories of all kinds have emerged to explain such an enigma:

• With a little less than 200 days left in office, Bush is grasping at straws - or logic, as we call it in the left-wing blogosphere - in a desperate effort to save the embers of his legacy after a tumultuous tenure at the helm of the American government.
• Bush no longer feels beholden to his voters, donors, supporters - most of whom suffer from chronic headupassness - and is grasping at all straws in sight to have a least one, true success before leaving office.
• Bush was kidnapped and water-boarded by former Secretary of State James Baker who convinces the current Executive to thank Iran for helping us with Afghanistan in the early days following 9/11.
• Bush will want to ride the coattails of potential positive policy utilized by the next president, Obama, and claim that the strategies this new president has found beneficial were actually introduced by Bush. No one will believe the failed oilman who duped a small majority of the country into believing he’d be the best leader to steer the U.S. into the next century.
• Presidential candidate John McCain has angered Bush by trying to forge a gap of reputation between the two old, white Republicans - prompting Bush to initiate policies that follow ideology spouted by Obama, not McCan’t.
• Or, conversely, Bush wants to initiate these more leftist strategies he mistakenly believes will fail, allowing McCain to distance himself from Bush and garner voter approval after these Democratic tactics fall short. First of all, too little too late for McCain and secondly - most surprising to Bush, these strategies actually WORK. Tally-ho!
• Bush wanted to plant a diplomatic effort in Iran to cover for a spy-team meant to infiltrate Iran’s confusing and secretive government hierarchy. Little did he know that President Obama would actually use the diplomatic team for diplomacy, goshdarnit.

Nevertheless, as the global population sits stunned over their morning coffee, reading rumors of the U.S. actively extending a diplomatic hand to Iran under the direction of W, the young, well-read student of history chuckles to himself in fond memory of his morning with the president and the dart that changed history.

Did Obama Just Lose My Vote?

This is serious. I’ve been saying for quite a while that Obama has not yet earned my vote and I am quite happy voting for Nader to help strengthen efforts toward a multi-party system. However, I voted for Obama in the primary here in Texas and was excited to vote for the first viable African-American candidate in the U.S.

Also, this is the most important election in years, if for no other reason than the necessity to populate the Supreme Court with judges who will protect civil liberties unlike those Bush has appointed or McCain would appoint.

While I have continuously lambasted the lack of character Hillary Clinton and her husband have shown during the primary season, I would not say I have been sipping “Obama Kool-Aid.” I understand that his “Change We Can Believe In” slogan is only as effective as his ability - to put it simply - to get things done. And politicians have to work together to accomplish progress. (Unless you’re President Bush, in which case you use the 9/11 attacks and existence of terrorism to scare Americans and politicians alike into marching behind your efforts to make the U.S. more of an authoritarian regime than ever before. Ugh, the thought makes it difficult to keep my coffee and chocolate granola cereal down.)

Obama is a politician first. With a degree in Government, I never lose sight of this. While Democrats fall in love (and Republicans fall in line) we must not forget that politicians must operate within the existing confines of the Washington Dance. This will inevitably lead to widespread disapointment with Obama, when he’s president, because he simply cannot please everyone and will have to compromise in order to accomplish certain goals. A president must make decisions when no option is the right one. It’s a hard gig - the hardest one in the world; I thoroughly recognize this.

However, much of my free time this week has been spent trolling the internet for a reasonable justification for Obama’s approval of the new FISA Act of 2008. Of course, I already have my fair share of underlying bitterness because the Democrats have performed disgracefully since taking control of the Congress. They are inexplicably banner ankle-grabbers again and again despite Bush’s record disapproval ratings. Yes, they do not want to seem weak on national security, but they are greatly underestimating the American people’s desire to have their civil liberties protected in this era of heightened danger.

Congressional members have far more concern with the length of their federal careers than casting the appropriate vote - rendering them impotent in the areas of war profiteering (Diane Feinstein’s husband is a defense contractor and why she still enjoys support in California, I have no idea. BTW, she vote AYE on FISA as well), criminal activity at the executive level (erasing emails, Karl Rove and Harriet Miers refusing to testify, Valerie Plame, fixing EPA reports and much, much more), reforming health care and national energy policy, policing unfair lending practices and allowing the establishment of a credit industry that works against the American people, not for them. It inexplicable that Congress has utterly failed to inhibit Bush’s harmful activities when the majority of Americans do not favor his policies in the slightest. It is frustrating and goddamned ridiculous.

So, Obama is Change personified, right?

Apparently, not so. Yes, I have read his blog on The Huffington Post regarding his FISA vote, which proffered no substantial logic for his approval of the bill. A few gems from the piece are:

Given the choice between voting for an improved yet imperfect bill, and losing important surveillance tools, I’ve chosen to support the current compromise. I do so with the firm intention — once I’m sworn in as president — to have my Attorney General conduct a comprehensive review of all our surveillance programs, and to make further recommendations on any steps needed to preserve civil liberties and to prevent executive branch abuse in the future.

Democracy cannot exist without strong differences. And going forward, some of you may decide that my FISA position is a deal breaker. That’s ok. But I think it is worth pointing out that our agreement on the vast majority of issues that matter outweighs the differences we may have.

The problem with our agreement on the vast majority of issues is that his vote on the FISA bill illustrates his inherent weakness and willingness to compromise when no comprise is needed simply to prove (which he fails to do with this vote) that he is strong on national security. This “aye” was unnecessary, dangerous, wrong, hurtful and potentially, yes, a deal breaker. Especially when assessing the guts of the bill, along with those who voted against it. On The Huffpo website, David Bromwich provides a very concise, yet in-depth look at the governmental powers granted with this legislation. I strongly recommend reading the blog and the readers’ comments below.

Among the senators who opposed the vote are Biden, Boxer, Dodd, Clinton, Byrd, Durbin, Feingold, Harkin, Kerry, Leahy, Reid and Levin.

The bottom line is that political agreements with a candidate are moot if the candidate does not have the political strength or fortitude to operate in accordance with that agreement.

Of course, Obama’s folding on FISA was a political calculation - that’s practically consensus. And I wish he could offer an honest defense of his vote; but, alas, this theater of election season would lead any such candor to damage the candidate.

Obama will be elected president barring any unforeseen, intensely damaging and highly unlikely circumstances. Though the media portrays the presidential race as close - it is a facade. McCain’s chances of succeeding in November, in my opinion, are around 1 in 5. Incumbent parties do not win when the economy is in the tank - mentally or not (and it’s not mental, Phil, when milk, bread, cereal, gas and all other necessities are more and more expensive and the dollar is weaker and weaker). McCain is not galvanizing and voter trust of most election issues points toward Obama. I wish Obama the best and will be hopeful as he takes his oath of office.

Furthermore, I applaud Obama’s willingness to work across the aisle and understand there will be areas in which he will break with Liberals. Support of faith-based community initiatives, for one (and this coming from an agnostic).

The FISA Act, however, is so detrimental to democracy itself, my respect for not just Obama himself, but the very idea of Obama has been irreparably damaged. I would encourage hardcore Obama supporters to keep this particular vote of his in mind when daydreaming of the days to come as he takes on the heavy mantle of President of the United States of America. Perfection at this level does not exist and any romance with a candidate will certainly abate over time.

I would never cast a vote for McFlip-Flop, nor would I ever stay home and waste a voting opportunity. Also, I am a thorough, complete supporter of a multi-party system. While I wanted to vote for Obama - and was excited to vote for him - my decision was not cast in stone. It still is not cemented. However, the odds I would pull the lever in support of him this November are greatly diminished. Truthfully, I am ever more looking in Nader’s direction.

If Obama’s political contributions continue to decline, I encourage him to address his FISA ‘08 support with increased seriousness. This is no small issue for those of us who follow politics and government activity.

This weekend, I plan on purchasing Obama’s two books and will begin reading them with a large grain of salt. Perhaps this will allow me some insight behind this recent mind-boggling decision of his.

As of this point, Obama is not Hope and he is not Change We Can Believe In. He is merely Better Than Bush, but isn’t everybody else?

Freaky Friday: John Edwards & Karl Rove to Debate

Did anyone catch this last Friday? The Buffalo News has learned that the University of Buffalo intends to include in its Distinguished Speaker Series a debate between John Edwards and Karl Rove on September 26. John Edwards and Karl Rove. Naturally, my mind immediately searches for the nearest comparison to such an unpredictable and unlikely competition of the minds (I use that term loosely).

The fastest duo to surface is, of course, Dopey vs. Beelzebub. But that’s too easy. I’m looking for something more nuanced. More apropos. Barbie vs. Cobra Commander? No…. Nemo vs. Ursula? No…. Luke Sykwalker vs. Jabba the Hutt? No! Not even close. John Edwards has no Force.

Gumby vs. Squealer from Animal Farm. That’s it.

Yes, I remember that John Edwards is a former trial attorney, but the images of him getting smoked by Dick Cheney in 2004 are seared into my brain. And while Karl Rove may have the morality of a dung beetle, his ability to misrepresent facts with a straight face is supernatural and would require Edwards to acquire an encyclopedic knowledge of politically-related statistics and their sources to properly refute Rove’s machinations. My not-so-amateur prediction is that John ain’t got the stuff. And I’m being kind.

If the debate is televised, I will certainly perform the masochistic duty of viewing the event - with a fist firmly planted between my teeth. Naturally, I try to avoid having Rove’s visage offend my home from the television and relegate my involvement with him by reading his erroneous comments online. Blech.

In the meantime, I’m going to entertain myself with paint.net and make fun graphics with hopeful themes.

john edwards crushes rove's head

I made Rove’s eyes red, but they may be too small to tell.

And did you see the headline on The Huffington Post this morning that Rep. Henry Waxman is considering legislation that would prevent a White House employee from being paid by taxpayer money to work on political affairs? He might wait until Obama is elected to launch this legislative attempt.

I’m encouraged by the possibility that Obama will roll back a number of powers Bush and Cheney concentrated at the executive level. McCain, of course, would not. Checks and balances are so silly, aren’t they?!

And one last tidbit of morning news - let’s give Howard Wolfson a big round of applause and wish him good luck as he joins Fox News. In a way I get it - he wants to bring a democratic voice to the network. But I also think he’s selling his soul to do it. Although, he seemed comfortable bending the truth when he worked for Hillary, so maybe he’ll fit right in.

Holy Shit - and I’m back

I just returned from a week-long jaunt to Vegas, newly married and found this on my television screen:

This is the “Teen Princess Dress” from the FLDS Dress website. That’s right. They’re selling their freaky 19th-century cult garb. Wow.

I mean, part of me wants to buy one. I already have an Islamic chador my friend got me from a market in the UAE and a beautifully embroidered Indian wedding sari I used as window drapery. I suppose I could start a collection of religious garb, but that would be creepy. Still, the idea of wearing one of these FLDS dresses for Halloween is almost irresistible. However, no dreams of once again taking first prize in the costume contest will convince me to place an order (last year, I took home the gold by dressing up as Chris Farley in the Lunch-Lady SNL sketch. I rocked it hard).

First of all, the smallest size they have is 8A. Now, I have no idea how freaky-cult 8A compares to the Real World size 8. Secondly, size 8A runs a cool $72.53. I don’t think if there is a god that it would want anyone to spend that kind of dough just to look chaste. Not with these gas prices. I mean, buy a sheet, cut a hole in the middle for your head and put a belt around it, for chrissakes.

Lastly, and most obvious, I take voting with the dollar seriously and will not support an intolerant, closed cult that practices sexual abuse and tax evasion (among many other crimes, I’m sure), refuses to educate the female members properly, is secretive and follows the late psychopath Joseph Smith. Not for any Halloween prize even if it’s really, really awesome.

High Gas Prices are, Indeed, a Good Thing

At least, when it comes to the environment and America’s legendary wastefulness.

We’re not a country of people who like to be told what to do. Janet Jackson railed against her parents “Control,” Madonna pleaded with her papa not to preach - she’s keeping her baby. I’m dating myself. Wait - I know Sum 41 doesn’t fall in line and become a victim of conformity. Shit, they’re Canadian.

ANYWAY. As Robert Reich said in The Work of Nations (if I remember correctly from college and i may not. the year i smoked the most weed, i made the dean’s list.), wealth is a relative term determined by what your neighbor either has or doesn’t. And Americans want to be wealthy. We want cavernous houses with rolling yards that require us to live far out of town.

Last August, the Gallup Poll reported the average American commuted 46 minutes on their way to work. Eighty-five percent of those polled said they drive themselves. For our commute, we choose Yahoes (Yukons or Tahoes), Hummers, and - here in Texas - massive trucks that don’t even fit in the average parking space, forcing the driver to slant their truck across two spots, giving me a crisis of conscience every time I feel an almost-unstoppable desire to key the offending truck. For Father’s Day, Nissan has been playing an ad in the DFW area, calling the Armada “Dad Big.” WTF??

We want to buy cheap products from China who use their low-cost labor, lack of consumer watch-dog, and terrible environmental standards to stock Wal-Mart’s shelves with every product imaginable and pollute more than many developed countries combined. Our celebrity royalty with their private jets have left carbon tread marks in the skies between L.A. and N.Y. Yet even the rich live paycheck to paycheck, relying on credit for the mini-mansions and gas-guzzlers, voting Republican and denying the existence of global warming (which is akin to, I don’t know…denying evolution, which even our glorious president does). We all know the song (shout out, neil diamond).

And as out-of-control gas prices portend a coming credit crisis, cause consumer goods to cost most families their first-born and lead to an increase in the foul language used at gas pumps across the nation - there is a reason to celebrate.

The Department of Transportation said yesterday Americans drove 30 billion - that’s BILLION - less miles between Nov. ‘07 and April ‘08 than during the same period the previous year. SUV sales were down 38 percent this May over last year (disclaimer: I say this while planning an SUV as my next vehicle purchase. However, it takes me, like, a whole year to drive 3,000 miles.) The media has ubiquitous reports of Pruises selling like hotcakes and the American Public Transportation Association reported June 2 that Americans took 85 million more trips on public transportation during the first quarter of ‘08 than during the same time the previous year.

Perhaps these high gas prices will continue to decrease our wasteful use of hydrocarbons and encourage us to live closer to work - even if in smaller houses - and drive less. I have to say the most annoying, yet beneficial idea that has emerged out of this crisis is the “staycation” which Urban Dictionary defines as: A vacation that is spent at one’s home enjoying all that home and one’s home environs have to offer or a vacation close to home. As a lake girl, I’ve long been a practitioner of such local enjoyment. Texas has the best lakes - nice and warm and perfect with a cooler full of beer floating beside you. This year, we only plan on traveling to Vegas - and that’s to tie the knot, which I think justifies expanding our carbon footprint out of state. God, I love Vegas.

In the meantime, whenever I spot a Smart Car, I’ll give a silent hoorah to the driver.

And I’ll think “Holy Crap, that Commuter Car is crazy awesome!” Seriously - go to the website, the photos are insane.

Personal Note: You guys at FireSociety Forum who started Carbon Belch Day are going to hell. I mean, I know I’m going to hell - but for other reasons, like if “Carbon Belch Day” had been a joke, I’d think it was hysterical. But, from what I can tell, you guys are for real. Even if you don’t believe in global warming (and, not to be judgmental, but that means you’re an unresearched, closed-minded schmo of ridonkulous proportions), it still makes sense to operate as environmentally-friendly as possible simply to cut down on waste and smog. You must be poor decision-makers and it is well known that poor decision-makers tend to have shitty lives and either end up in prison (in which your carbon footprint would be reduced anyway) or on Judge Judy. Either way, I’ll see you in eternal damnation, biotches (the use of that word dates me as well, doesn’t it?).

Rummy Declines to Endorse McCain

Looks like there’s dissent in the dysfunctional elderly Republican sandbox. When asked by The Hill whether he would support McFlipflop for president, former disastrous Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld would not offer an answer.

Afterwards, lightning struck the former SoD when he claimed he was not following the election and instead focusing on his private foundation. Not following the election. And I’m a size 2.

Rummy was not injured by the lightning strike. Apparently, he built up an immunity to lightning strikes during his latest White House cabinet tenure whenever discussing the Iraq War.

This photo, taken in July 2002, shows the bandaging required during Rumsfeld’s testifying before the Senate Armed Services Committee. The explanation given for the cast was “arthritis surgery.” We know the truth.

According to a Senate investigation, it was during this time that Rumsfeld started to research the use of waterboarding, stress positions and sensory deprivation.

Why Does Baby Jesus Hate Iowa?

Pat Robertson, referring to the 9/11 attacks said, “We have allowed rampant secularism and occult, et cetera, to be broadcast on television. We have permitted somewhere in the neighborhood of 35 to 40 million unborn babies to be slaughtered in our society. We have a Court that has essentially stuck its finger in God’s eye and said, ‘We’re going to legislate you out of the schools, we’re going to take your Commandments from off the courthouse steps in various states, we’re not going to let little children read the Commandments of God, we’re not going to let the Bible be read — no prayer in our schools.’ We have insulted God at the highest levels of our government. And, then we say ‘why does this happen?’ Well, why its happening is that God Almighty is lifting His protection from us.”

Jerry Falwell said to Pat Roberston on the 9/11 attacks, “And, I know that I’ll hear from them for this. But, throwing God out successfully with the help of the federal court system, throwing God out of the public square, out of the schools. The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad. I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way — all of them who have tried to secularize America — I point the finger in their face and say “you helped this happen.”

John Hagee said, in response to Hurricane Katrina, “All hurricanes are acts of God because God controls the heavens. I believe that New Orleans had a level of sin that was offensive to God and they were recipients of the judgment of God for that.”

Okay. Big bad things happen to bad people. Gotcha.

My question is, why is god mad at Iowa? A very Christian state, I find it surprising that Iowa is experiencing record floods following a plague of tornadoes. Johnson County Emergency Management spokesman Mike Sullivan said, “This is our version of Katrina.” Psalm 148:7-8 says, “Praise the LORD from the earth, Sea monsters and all deeps; Fire and hail, snow and clouds; Stormy wind, fulfilling His word.”

So, Iowa, what’d you do? Perhaps Robertson and Hagee will speak up and give us some insight into this matter since they seem to be so insightful. Alas, Falwell cannot share with us his opinion cause he’s already with Baby Jesus.

Now Baby Jesus is mad. Mad at Iowa. But why?

A quick Google search offers up some ideas:

• Ethanol subsidies (Huffpo comment by jsarets)
• Giving Obama an early lead in the primaries (Google Groups)
• Punishing the scouts for their homophobia (Yahoo India - have to click on the hidden answers)
• Birthin’ up Tom Arnold (Craiglist comment)
• It’s just the weather (Rachel Griffiths on Daily Kos)

I don’t think we’ll truly know the answer until one of the esteemed men of god who have such a direct connection with the almighty ask Him to give them the 411. You can email John Hagee Ministries here and ask him, like I did, why god hates Iowa and maybe that will help focus his discussions with god on this topic (you have to fill in your phone number and, fyi, 968-7825 translates into “you suck”).

In the meantime, let’s just hope that Baby Jesus sees fit to let those 36,000 naughty people back into their homes.

Tim Russert’s Replacement

The news of Tim Russert’s death hit this household pretty hard as he was a regular fixture on the television. His sudden heart attack probably wouldn’t be so painful for the rest of us had it not struck in the middle of this - the most important political campaign season in over half a century. We kept asking each other who could possibly replace him at the Meet the Press? Who could bring the unflinching - yet, not unfriendly - inquisition, the stringent lack of bias, the leave-no-stone-unturned preparation and the unparalleled passion? The easy answer: no one.

Still, the show must go on and Tim would likely want it that way.

While his wake has not yet begun, I’m sure the authorities at NBC are scrambling to find a suitable replacement that will honor the memory of Tim Russert while asserting the individual talents the next host. I offer my opinions as an outsider and really have the utmost curiosity as to the strategies employed by those who will choose Tim’s successor.

I would bet that they are only looking inside the NBC family, perhaps one of Tim’s protégés, for a good candidate. So, I’ll evaluate those I think are first in line - and, obviously, I could be way off.

Chris Matthews

I seriously doubt Chris is really in contention. First of all, he’s too old. The new moderator of Meet the Press needs to be more youthful - around 40, I’d say - and ready to carry the mantle for a decade or more. Furthermore, Chris is really making his mark on his own show, Hardball, that was designed for him and suits him so well. I rarely miss it. Plus, Chris can be inclined to put that old foot in his mouth, which I generally appreciate being prone to the disease myself, but it just doesn’t seem Meet the Press style.

David Gregory

David Gregory, perhaps the next in line for such a promotion, is another ballsy, no-holds-barred questioner whether he was insisting on an answer from the president or one of his subordinates. He is tenacious and another one of those seemingly-encyclopedic minds regarding the machine that is Washington. His problem: he doesn’t have the X factor (I hate that saying). While you can sense his fever for politics, there is nothing that truly draws the viewer to him. Perhaps he needs more camera time as a moderator on Race for the White House to hit his stride.

Norah O’Donnell

Norah would be one of my top picks. She’s smart, sassy, from Texas and would be the first woman host of Meet the Press. She’s either just had her third kid in a year or is about to have it, which would likely be a major factor in her decision should she be offered the position. She’s only 34 and could take a few years to really reach the same level of respect Tim had with those whom he sparred. I think she’d be a wonderful replacement, though. She is, however, and Irish Catholic - which wouldn’t do well in the area of ethnic diversity for the show, but - in my expert opinion - gender diversity makes up for it.

Chuck Todd

Chuck would the shot in the dark - completely inexperienced in both on-air hosting duties and hardcore questioning of politicos. I think he would be great, however. Chuck has the gleam in the eye that was so magnetic in Tim. He understands the numbers and the culture and has the work ethic of an appropriate successor. Already, he’s a fast-rising star with his own cultish fan base of newsies. His responses are measured and well thought out. He stays calm and collected and humble whenever the camera light finds him. He’s a relative unknown, but with a few years’ marination in the interviewer’s seat, he’d be awesome.

I’m leaving out David Shuster, Kelly O’Donnell - even Rachel Maddow would be a good candidate if she didn’t wear her bias (or, as I like to think, common sense) on her sleeve (I really dig her commentary and analysis, though). The new host, I think, should be a hardworking youngblood. Tim was a little over 40 when he took the reigns and a replacement of that age would be given time to mature without too much viewer judgment.

Hopefully, they’ll rotate hosts in the next weeks using members of the NBC family, as well as outsiders and political insiders. That will provide time for the best decision to be made while keeping viewer interest to see how each guest host performs. The prerequisite should only be their preparation, passion and camera readiness.

I’ll be watching and supportive regardless of who they pick to rebuild the legacy. No one can replace Tim, but at least his memory can be honored by the choice of an excellent successor.

UPDATE: L.A. Times reporting Brian Williams to host Meet the Press this weekend. I’ll be watching.

Tim, I’m Going to Miss the Hell Out of You

I was a Meet The Press addict and always un-muted the television when I saw your face. You’ll be with us on Convention Night and during the coverage of November 5th. You were thick, rich, insightful and your commentary was unequaled in its authority and command.

I’ll have an Irish beer for you tonight, big fella. Peace.

Hall of Shame: S.C. Approves “I Believe” License Plates

I make no bones about my disappointment with the rise in religious fundamentalism in this country and how detrimental such developments are, mostly having to do with failed abortion-only policies, the rise of anti-intellectualism, the accepting of intolerant and unconstitutional bans on gay marriage, and the promotion of power of men like George W. Bush, Pat Robertson, John Hagee and the late Jerry Falwell. Though, the rise in fundamentalism likely portends its downfall as progress is an unstoppable force, a law in South Carolina took effect yesterday that expresses the deep inability for many Americans to reconcile the brainwashing of their childhood with the reason and common sense their adulthoods.

South Carolina now offers “I Believe” license plates at $4 to $6.

Such a license plate is an example of a governmental endorsement of a religion and a shameful illustration of the domination of unfounded mythology on our society.

Ask yourself whether the South Carolina state legislature would support a license plate expressing support of Islam, Judaism, Atheism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Scientology or Wicca. Right.

The ACLU and American Jewish Congress are considering action over this huge legal disappointment in South Carolina (which, by the way, failed in Florida in April). Here at politicalmpressions (which is just me), we wholemindedly support their efforts to have this state-sponsored endorsement of Christianity revoked.

Had this happened in Texas, I myself would raise my voice to its greatest heights to help preserve the separation of church and state.

Silver Lining: Marcus Aurelius points out in his comment on Think Progress, “It’s nice to know who the morons are when you’re out driving.”

Here We Go: June 19, Americans United for Separation of Church and State “asks a judge to stop the state from making the plates and rule that the law allowing them violates the First Amendment.” For more, read here. Aaaahh, I love the smell of progress and common sense.

Let’s Talk Scott McClellan

I waited to comment on the whole Benedict McClellan issue until I seen a few of his interviews and how the media reacted and, I have to say, I’m disappointed in our journalistic brethren - but when am I not, really? He’ll be on Hardball later today and I’ll watch that without expectation that Chris Matthews will somehow cunningly extract new revelations from our little Texas pudge muffin.

One of the most important, yet eentzy facts when addressing What Happened? has only reached my ears once amid the media and political brouhaha the book has stirred. He repeatedly says he’s from a political family and, as a Texas resident, allow me to offer you a little history. His mother is Carol Keeton Strayhorn, a well-known politician in our state having served as first female mayor of state capital Austin, state comptroller of public accounts, as well as the first woman on the Texas Railroad Commission (which largely regulates the oil and gas industry) and, lastly, having run for governor in our last election. She started out as a Democrat (most rural Oklahomans and Texans are old-school Democrats from the times before the parties swapped demographics decades ago), but caught up with the times and became Republican in the 80’s. Recently, she opted to break from the state Republican party, who currently suckles at the teat of Gov. Rick Perry (Bush’s Lt. Governor and arguably one of the worst governors in TX history) and register her gubernatorial campaign under the Independent banner. She claimed she wanted to set partisan politics aside. Now we’ve been hearing that theme from her son as one of the main reasons he served Bush and continued to serve Bush while disagreeing with him on weighted issues such as the war of choice that has developed into the quagmire of Iraq.

I’m not questioning the sincerity of their claims of detestation of the partisan politics - in fact, I’m glad to see long-established Republicans breaking from the good ‘ol boy system we have in Texas. However, those in search of an understanding of the motivations behind What Happened? as well as McClellan’s seemingly openness to an Obama vote must look to his status as mamma’s boy, rather than as former press secretary for Bush.

(that’s scott on the left - found the photo in The Austin Chronicle)

One of the assertions I have found helpful in my few efforts to understand Scott McClellan is that he was misused as press secretary and simply wasn’t a good candidate for the position. I concur. Having watched many of his press conferences, his inability to communicate effectively with the press corps and adversarial relationship with it made it painful to watch as he inartfully dodged question after question. Robert Draper, author of Dead Certain (I’ll submit a review of this book soon), characterized Scott McClellan as, “looking like nothing so much as a terrified if well-fed koala bear as he peered out from behind the press room podium and recited his message lines as if at gunpoint.”

While it is true the administration simply used the position of press secretary as merely a buffer from the intrusion of the media and not as a way to effectively reach the American people, Scott still clearly misunderstood the priority of the podium. He repeatedly, almost certainly, used plausible deniability as a justification not to push for information from the administration and clearly underestimated his responsibility as message-deliverer. While he states in his book that Bush convinces himself of whatever he needs to in order to stick to his guns, Scott obviously did so as well.

The mere fact that there is so much “pot calling the kettle black” in this book is quite unsettling. Also, upon hearing the style of speech and grammatical mistakes in McClellan’s interviews, I am almost positive he used a ghostwriter as the quotations I’ve read from the book are incredibly poignant and well-written. Many people write much better than they speak (especially with the help of an editor) and it is not a huge deal to use a ghostwriter, but it is an issue I think he should address in his media campaign. While many of these memoirs use ghostwriters, I doubt Dee Dee Myers, George Stephanopolous, Doug Feith or Ari Fleischer relied so heavily on someone else’s pen. As a writer, I feel this makes a difference in the sincerity of the book.

I do agree that Scott McClellan should have had the fortitude of character to leave the administration, or raise his voice, if he felt so out-of-step with the direction toward warfare Bush and Cheney so vehemently veered. Having not done so, the publishing of his critical memoir before the exit of Bush (and I’m no fan of the guy) is questionable. Obviously, he’s angry about the whole Plame debacle, as well he should be. But his memoir delivers no new evidence of the wrong-doings by the snakes in the White House. It’s simply a case of too little, too late, bubba. Anti-climactic and irrelevant.

The reaction out of the administration and its former members is so paltry and fake, however, it only lends credence to the memoir itself. Even those no longer in the employ of the administration stuck to the set talking points so deliberately, they should have just put Perino’s comments on replay. The reaction, no doubt planned during the month the White House had access to the memoir before its existence was leaked, only issued meager character assassinations of Scott rather than refuted a single fact in the book. Gag.

The subject is a tired one and won’t remain in the top news categories much longer, if it still is. I have no idea where Scott goes from here besides aiding his mother’s possible run for Austin mayor next year. It’s still undecided if he’d be an asset to anybody at this point.

I suppose I’m glad Scott decided to write openly about his misgivings during his tenure in the Bush administration. Better late than never. This however, shouldn’t be a celebration for us lefties, but more a sad realization that the plague of acquiescence in the government during run up to the Iraq War has cost hundreds of thousands of lives, untold collateral damages as illustrated in the rise of commodity prices, and should never, ever be duplicated by anybody in the government or military claiming to have a spine and the ability to reason.

Puerto Rico Primary

In celebration of Hillary Clinton’s predictable win in Puerto Rico, I thought I’d remind everyone that Puerto Rico and Guam do not actually vote in the U.S. general election.

So, when Hillary Clinton tortures us with repeated, constant, never-ending claims that she won the popular vote, let’s take into account that Puerto Rico and Guam’s electorates matter not AND she’s discounting Obama’s caucus votes AND she’s counting Michigan, which is ludicrous because he wasn’t even on the ballot.

So, congratulations, Hillary. You still suck.

Reaction to DNC Rules Committee Meeting

Damn.

That was AWESOME! They should televise all these political committee meetings. Especially so we voters can see first-hand when we’re getting screwed. This time, however, I thought the DNC Rules Committee did a good job with the task they were given. Hell, it was better than the Super bowl for us political junkies.

Michigan/New Hampshire Squabble

Let me say first I learned an extremely important historical fact that altered my opinion of the Michigan Primary leapfrog and I wish I had known it sooner. Senator Levin, speaking on behalf of Michigan explained that back in 2004, the DNC Rules Committee decided that New Hampshire would go third in the primary schedule and the second spot would rotate among the states. According to Levin, New Hampshire decided they would not abide by these rules, as you can view here, and scheduled their primary in the second primary position. From what I have researched, in 2006, the DNC Rules Committee recommended New Hampshire hold their primary January 22, 2008 and Nevada take the number 2 spot by holding their caucus January 19. Obviously, New Hampshire decided it did not have to follow DNC recommendations and did whatever their politically privileged little hearts desired.

This is extremely important. New Hampshire received a waiver from the DNC and was allowed to sidestep the “rules” - which angered Michigan who then opted to advance their primary anyway. Well, obviously, with the machine politics that somehow inserts itself into our system and poisons the well of sincere democracy, the DNC - probably not wanting to encourage primary scheduling chaos - refused an egalitarian solution to the issue and banished Michigan to the netherworld of irrelevancy whilst grabbing their ankles and giving spoiled little New Hampshire their second place lest Concord pitch a grand mal and thrust the party into primary warfare that could allow the Republicans to ride the wave back into the White House.

Got it? Didn’t think so. It’s all very tawdry and shameful and undemocratic - which is what you get when you refuse to support a viable multi-party system and cede our government to big-government Democrats or Corporatocracy-Republicans.

In any case, I found myself having much more sympathy with Michigan today than I did yesterday. However, I still agree with the punishments meted out by the DNC Rules Committee to Michigan and Florida because one simply cannot have states running around willy-nilly, flotsam-jetsam setting their primaries whenever they may.

Primary Scheduling

Obviously, someone needs to be the voice of reason in this whole clusterf*#k and I kindly offer myself up for such a position - even though I am not a Democrat (I research all candidates and tend to vote all over the place and am, therefore, Independent).

1. Move all primaries back to March. It is ridiculous to have the primaries sneaking up every election season, lengthening the campaign season and wasting hundreds of millions of dollars when people should be saving for their retirement or their children’s college educations rather than donating to lost-cause campaigns. Some of you may think the Democrat Party would do themselves a disservice by moving their primaries back and allowing the Republicans to hold their primaries first. I disagree. Without doubt, this prolonged Democratic primary season has kept John McCain largely on the second-page of the news cycle. This would continue to happen as coverage follows the Democratic primaries, the lone Republican candidate is forgotten. Yay.

2. Rotate the schedule among the states so that each year, states take a different place of influence on the calendar. To give Iowa and New Hampshire the position of privilege every year is at most undemocratic and at the least illogical and beyond reason.

3. All primaries must be primaries. None of the caucus bullscheiβe! Old people, people who are working, etc. cannot attend caucuses and cannot have their voices heard through their presence. Either have a mail-in vote (sketchy) or have an ID-required vote. That is the best way to ensure democracy is actual and we are not hypocritical in our claim of having the best electoral system (although, we are anyway because of the presence of the electoral college).

Basic Reaction to the DNC Rules Committee Meeting Itself

Allow me to preface this section by saying that due to the Saturday designation of the meeting, I missed all that happened before 11:30 a.m. and didn’t catch any of the debate regarding the Florida situation. I heard it was good, though. Also, because they came back so late from lunch and I ate a huge one myself, I missed a bit of the debate before the Florida vote. Whatever.

Best line of the day: Carl Levin quoting Will Rogers, “I belong to no organized party. I’m a Democrat.” Hear! Hear! Well said.

Former Michigan Governor Blanchard, when addressing the rules committee on behalf of Sen. Clinton, was way annoying in his intro. I mean, here they are trying to decide how naughty Michigan was and he has to take up all this time talking about how he was raised by a single mother. What???? Exit stage left, guv. jeez.

Michigan and Florida peeps keep claiming the voters have been punished enough. How have they been punished? By having national media attention heaped on the ineptitude of their states’ party leadership? Give me a break. Now, if they had each been tasered when they entered the voting booth, we could talk about how they’ve been punished. Politically, I would equate the last four months as a day at the spa for those leap-froggers.

Um…Can anyone tell me why there aren’t young people on the rules committee? Yeah, yeah, I saw a few members that were probably in their 40’s. But, I’m 30, so 40 is old and if they want to be appropriately representative of the U.S. demographic, there definitely needed to be more Hispanics, more Asians, and more young people, yo! I’m sure it wouldn’t be hard to find a young, deserving sprite with an intelligent opinion. For real!

Lastly, did anyone catch those Hillary protesters?! I’m embarrassed. I really am. Seriously, they were all white, female and over 50. It was ubiquitous jiggles as they raised their hands in the air and chanted “Denver! Denver!” First of all, yawn. Second of all, come up with a better slogan, like “The Committee Sucks!” or “Michigan Rules!” or, my personal favorite, “Your mother is a whore!” And, at the end, there were only about 25 of these menopausal renegades left standing at the base of the escalator shouting and watching as no one paid attention to them. Babes, you picked the wrong horse. You chose a candidate that matched your demographic rather than one with character and good judgement. Face the music and eat shit. Is that harsh? Hmmm. Somehow, I don’t care.

Really, though. Even if Clinton appeals the decision and takes it further, she will still lose. Even if hell freezes over and the DNC seats Michigan in full as the votes were cast in the primary - which they shouldn’t - she would still lose. But hey, way to divide the party and anger Democrat voters so they can’t rally around Obama the way they want. Way to distract Obama from his real task of kicking McCain’s ass. Way to place personal ambition over national progress. Way to go, Hillary. You’re hypocritical, dishonorable and, more than anything, you have a mullet. Go away. Really, just go.

Well, GREAT Saturday! One of the best Saturdays ever. They need to televise these meeting more often. It’s time for a margarita and, being from Texas, throwin some ribs on the grill! Yeeee-friggin-haw, people!

(and i don’t give a shit what my teacher-sister says, I am NOT checking my spelling on this blog. it’s party time)

I Am Not An Astrophysicist, But I Play One Online

In response to the piece by ABC news that 16 percent of American science teachers believe in Creationism, I posted this comment on The Huffington Post:

ME:

Creationism is in direct opposition of the Law of Conservation of Mass-Energy and is not founded scientifically, therefore should not be taught in science class.

Good source: Atheist Universe by David Mills

Shame on the rise of anti-intellectualism in America. As we allow these attacks on science, the U.S. will suffer economically, technologically, culturally and globally. It’s these conservative christian isolationists that are dooming America and causing America’s loss of hegemony that the isolationists so fervently believe in.

My comments led to the following debate:

Myshkin57: Eh… conservation of mass is not a good reason to reject it. A good reason to reject it is that there is no reason to accept it. Further, the problem with creationism being taught as science is not its inconsistency with other scientific theory; most scientific theories were inconsistent with the scientific theories at the time they were first proposed. The problem is that it is not science (i.e. not testable, falsifiable, verifiable, etc.)

Delvin McGee: by that notion so does the Big Bang Theory

TMAN: Except that those laws or better yet, the particular laws of the Universe we inhabit were a product of the particular vacumn fluctuation as part and parcel of the Big Bang. Should another fluctuation occur within our Universe the Laws of Physics we observe now would be gone as would we.

Many of the most important elements of the Big Bang are “theory” in name only and have been supported, verified by rigorous scientific research, experimentation and testing.

ME: Big Bang does not defy the Law of Conservation of Mass-Energy:
Currently, all matter in the universe is expanding and will continue to do so until it exceeds critical density, at which point gravitational forces will cause the universe to collapse on itself, called the Big Crunch (you can wiki it). As all matter returns to a single contiguous point, the theory suggests that our universe of mass energy will explode in yet another Big Bang.

Therefore, mass-energy was not created. It has always existed and has most likely always been expanding and contracting.

TMAN: The increased rate of expansion has nothing to do with the Universe “exceeding critical density”. In fact the exact opposite is proposed as one “hypothosis” where matter/energy continues to expand and cool thus dissipating, for “eternity” “the BIG FREEZE”

Visable Mass-energy and the laws pertaining to them (they are the same) are a product of this Universe only, initial conditions sets the “laws”

You are aware that the expansion of the Universe also includes (though not often mentioned) the creation of the “new” space it is expanding into, as it expands, arent you?

ME: ah, excellent debate.

let me proffer that as the universe expands, space stretches - which contradicts the idea that new space is created.

TMAN: “let me proffer that as the universe expands, space stretches”

-Into what?

When I used the term “space” into which the Universe expands, I mis-used the word. My bad. Outside the “boundry limit ” of the Universe is nothing. The Universe (which contains within itself all of “space” and time, expands into that nothing that the Universe has expanded its boundry limit to. This is next to impossible to visualize or comprehend but mathmatically thats what is said to be happening as we speak.

ME: i see what you are saying, but what about the multi-universe hypothesis?

outside our universe is simply another universe, perhaps contracting, and that our universe is not simply expanding into nothing. the number of universes could be indeterminate.

So far, I have yet to receive another response from TMAN. Seeing as how I pulled most of what I asserted out of my ass (aside from the information I picked up from David Mills), I’m curious if anyone out there has any thoughts or corrections or suggestions.

UPDATE: TMAN finally answered my last response: Yes, thats possible or even the latest rage, “vibrating, interacting Branes”. At that point it’s a little over my head.

But, it’s magnificent isn’t it? And the thing is, it appears that it’s set up to give us exactly what we ask for. So it’s imperative that we learn and understand all that we can then take responsibility for our actions within the known and understood Universe. One doesn’t need fables if one is intellectually and physically engaged with it.
Thanks, TXpastafarian, for the dialogue.

To which I answered: I agree. It’s the discussion and quest for knowledge that matters. Anytime!